We've all struggled with that "green eyed monster of jealousy" at one time or another, even if we do not want to admit it.It presents itself in many forms; from wanting someone's hair style, to longing for someone else's home life.
Recently I saw a statement on a friend's social network status that said, "jealousy is the art of counting someone else's blessings". I like this simplified way of expressing jealousy.
A couple of weeks ago I observed that "green eyed monster" in a small group setting among mothers as they talked about the accomplishments of their toddlers and pre-schoolers.
One of the mothers made a positive statement about how well her four year old was advancing in a particular area as the other mothers listened, but with little enthusiasm. As soon as the first mother was done speaking a second mother interjected her own toddlers recent success without a smile or word of encouragement to the statement of the first mother.
Jealousy does not allow us be happy for others!
For me, the most epic example of jealousy is found in the Bible between a women named Rachel and a women named Leah. Sadly, they were sisters (Genesis 30:1) and married to the same man. Now that would definitely cause problems in a home and jealousy would be a given.
It's a long sad story of envy and bitterness. Each women was blessed by God and yet neither women could see the blessings she had in her own life and choose instead to be jealous of the other women's blessings.
Jealousy is a cruel critic of others.
While jealousy can be defined as the fear of losing affection or position, it is one of it's synonyms that caught my attention, envy.
Envy is best defined as a discontentment and resentment brought on by a desire for the possessions or qualities of a another person.
Ouch, that seems harsh doesn't it.
I tend to prefer the word jealousy over envy, it sounds less condemning.
I don't like to think of myself as being discontented or resentful because I desire someone else's stuff or life. But when I catch myself in the act of jealousy, I take the time to examine my motives. If I am not looking to "justify" the act, I can often admit that it is really envy that I am dealing with. I then must ask myself, "Am I counting someone else's blessings?".
So what can we do to fight that "green eyed monster"? The simplest answer I can find is contentment.
When we are contented (satisfied) with what we have and who we are, we have less cause to react in envy to what we think someone has or who we think they are.
By changing words, the phrase we read earlier about jealousy can become, "Contentment is the art of counting my own blessings".
Another way of being content is being happy and rejoicing with and for those around us. When we can be genuinely happy for someone's accomplishments, qualities, and position we will not only be more contented, but we will also find ourselves developing deeper more meaningful relationships.
STUDY TO LEARN:
If you want to go a little deeper into this topic here are some passages from the Bible to help you in your personal study.
Jealousy and envy:
Proverbs 14:30 ; Proverbs 27:4 ; Titus 3:3
Romans 12 is a good place to start when thinking about how to be content as well as how we can respond to those around us in positive ways. Give special attention to verses 15 and 16.
