Unforgiveness, unrealistic expectation, hurtful words, lack of encouragement, yelling, confusion,self-centeredness, unfair punishment, do any of these words resonate with you? They do with me. I could go on but they are not the true focus.
During a study about forgiveness I found myself coming back to the word love. As I took a personal evaluation of what love is and what it is not,I kept coming up short.
Then something dawned on me, something that I had never thought of before, love (according to the Bible) is NOT providing for the physical needs of our family, which is a lie that has been spawned for generations.
Why would I make such a statement? Well, the Bible personally draws out the man who does not provide for the physical needs of his family and calls him a sluggard but I cannot find where the Bible relates bringing home a pay check as an act of truly loving.
Also, "Love is"...does not only apply to how we respond and interact with believers and the world, it is also how we respond to, interact with, and love our family.
This was an eye opener for me. Not because I was/am the bread winner for my family or because my husband shirked his responsibilities but because it made me realize that I was a child that grew up without love.
I am more than familiar with the "adjectives" listed in the opening. Growing up in a home where a pay check was brought home by someone that would rather be feared, revered, and obeyed without question, has a difficult time showing love of biblical proportions.
None of us is perfect! We must forgive and move on but more importantly we must learn to love as God loves. How do we love? Where do we learn what love is? How do we apply it? How do we avoid what come naturally to our selfish nature?
How does forgiveness, kindness, mercy, tender-heartedness, bearing with one another sound? Better that the first list, right!? The only way I know to find what is real and lasting is to go to the original source of love-God (remember God the Son, Jesus, showed the ultimate love by dying for our sins). How about starting your search with Ephesians 4:31-5:2, Ephesians 5:1-2, Colossians 3:12-15, James 2:13. Don't forget to pray for God's help as you learn to really love. Oh, and don't be afraid to apologize!
